Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
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