we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
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