I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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