did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
