dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize