i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
