I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
