dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
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