You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Randomize
