Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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