It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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