Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize