I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?