Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze. http://tfl.nu/xfyl
  Replies (25) Good night (4655) Bad night (788)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two. http://tfl.nu/ya0u
  Replies (31) Good night (6794) Bad night (1329)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line. http://tfl.nu/s6mt
  Replies (27) Good night (2912) Bad night (1914)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog. http://tfl.nu/zv3p
  Replies (10) Good night (3294) Bad night (1853)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog http://tfl.nu/4hna
  Replies (2) Good night (1101) Bad night (3515)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house. http://tfl.nu/gobb
  Replies (7) Good night (1570) Bad night (1011)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that http://tfl.nu/8ytu
  Replies (13) Good night (1162) Bad night (4874)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out. http://tfl.nu/ejyb
  Replies (4) Good night (923) Bad night (1517)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (828): Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it http://tfl.nu/gdjw
  Replies (7) Good night (468) Bad night (2126)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed. http://tfl.nu/r0u0
  Replies (1) Good night (946) Bad night (719)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around http://tfl.nu/v7uu
  Replies (5) Good night (886) Bad night (364)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (989): Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad. http://tfl.nu/i278
  Replies (3) Good night (697) Bad night (300)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection. http://tfl.nu/m3hm
  Replies (2) Good night (462) Bad night (316)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room. http://tfl.nu/dcq0
  Replies (2) Good night (754) Bad night (287)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon http://tfl.nu/5eu4
  Replies (2) Good night (611) Bad night (141)

Randomize