he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Randomize