Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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