He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Randomize
