do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize