I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
