Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
