so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
