the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
