pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
