Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
