He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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