My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
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I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
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Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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