did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
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