I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
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