That's when you crack a 10am beer
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Randomize