No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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