If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
