Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize