it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
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