I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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