im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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