I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize