i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
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