All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
