Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(514): View more from Quebec

you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night

(514): View more from Quebec

i got kicked out last time for laughing

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(514): you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night (514): i got kicked out last time for laughing http://tfl.nu/qj8w

Replies (37) Good night (3668) Bad night (624)
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(647): View more from Ontario

Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.

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(647): Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer. http://tfl.nu/62rw

Replies (14) Good night (3363) Bad night (1107)
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(248): View more from Michigan

I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.

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(248): I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name. http://tfl.nu/axbm

Replies (33) Good night (1583) Bad night (13719)
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(605): View more from South Dakota

Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this

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(605): Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this http://tfl.nu/ch0i

Replies (19) Good night (1090) Bad night (2793)
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(787): View more from Puerto Rico

He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.

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(787): He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him. http://tfl.nu/klex

Replies (21) Good night (4591) Bad night (1125)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.

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(724): Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately. http://tfl.nu/qxtl

Replies (8) Good night (2351) Bad night (1335)
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(734): View more from Michigan

They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.

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(734): They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you. http://tfl.nu/tuzf

Replies (5) Good night (2321) Bad night (802)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....

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(732): say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today.... http://tfl.nu/1sxc

Replies (3) Good night (817) Bad night (1293)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it

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(215): It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it http://tfl.nu/0xgu

Replies (9) Good night (1785) Bad night (721)
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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.

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(902): I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas. http://tfl.nu/cu8d

Replies (4) Good night (1299) Bad night (815)
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(713): View more from Texas

I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.

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(713): I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend. http://tfl.nu/unpl

Replies (4) Good night (782) Bad night (278)
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(757): View more from Virginia

Oh and I'm kind of in the library.

(757): View more from Virginia

Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.

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(757): Oh and I'm kind of in the library. (757): Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move. http://tfl.nu/r83r

Replies (1) Good night (470) Bad night (321)
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(623): View more from Arizona

Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!

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(623): Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies! http://tfl.nu/zfby

Replies (9) Good night (363) Bad night (595)
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(561): View more from Florida

I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon

(850): View more from Florida

Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found

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(561): I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon (850): Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found http://tfl.nu/d5sg

Replies (4) Good night (788) Bad night (265)
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(602): View more from Arizona

We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.

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(602): We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening. http://tfl.nu/4cd0

Replies (9) Good night (770) Bad night (353)

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