I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Found your dick twin last night
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
my poor anus
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
