I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
