I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Randomize
