you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
