Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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