Rock
Scissors
Fuck
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize