mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Randomize
