I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize