normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Randomize
