Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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