i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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