yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
