Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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